The Importance Of The Paternal Grandmother To The Family
Many parents depend on grandparents to raise their children. Working hours, exhaustion, excess obligations at home or a period of illness are some of the reasons why grandparents come to the aid of their children and grandchildren.
However, it is almost always the maternal grandmother who fulfills this role. And the paternal grandmother?
The role of the paternal grandmother in the family
For some reason, in some families, the role of the paternal grandmother has been relegated to the background over time. She only appeared as her husband’s mother and mother-in-law. In fact, we rarely took tours or spent quality time with this grandmother.
This question has become an object of research, since some allude to the effect that a paternal grandmother can have on grandchildren when compared to a maternal grandmother. However, studies are often based on unproven hypotheses.
Furthermore, there is no doubt about the feelings that maternal and paternal grandparents have for their grandchildren. Keep this in mind when sharing the time the child spends with the grandmother.
Social problem: maternal or paternal grandmother
In general, the tendency to leave children with the maternal grandmother makes the paternal grandmother feel jealous and conflicts start to happen. Often the problem snowballs and affects the couple’s relationship.
The mother must be aware that the relationship with her mother-in-law may influence the thoughts and feelings of her children in relation to their paternal grandmother.
If the relationship between you is not good, the children can move away from mom and dad. When young, they may be afraid to be with their paternal grandmother.
How to maintain a good relationship with the paternal grandmother?
It is necessary to analyze the situation with peace of mind. Consider the following points:
- It is not recommended to force children to interact with a grandparent.
- You must let the children’s affection for the paternal grandmother happen naturally.
- Do not make negative comments about the paternal grandmother in the presence of children.
- Let children develop their own preferences for their grandparents.
- As a mother, make an effort to maintain a sincere and positive relationship with your mother-in-law. That way the children will follow your example.
- Plan activities and include your mother-in-law, such as a walk in the park or a meal.
- When possible, allow her to collaborate as she pleases. Whether it’s taking care of the kids or helping out economically. This will make her feel useful and loved.
Importance of the paternal grandmother
The paternal grandmother is no exception when it comes to supporting her grandchildren’s education. It can make a difference in the development and relationships they will have with others in the future. It’s also a way to strengthen the relationship with Dad.
Remember that the love that the grandmother shows towards her grandchildren is the same that she dedicates to her son, who is now the father of her grandchildren. You, in your role as a mother, can contribute a lot so that the rapprochement happens in the best possible way.
The bond between your children and their grandmother is not only natural, it is also necessary to encourage it. Grandparents are not surrogate mothers, but whenever they want they can spend time with their children. The affection that can exist between grandparents and grandchildren goes beyond the genes they share.
The grandmother, in turn, can help create a positive relationship when she doesn’t disallow the parents’ decisions, even if she doesn’t agree with that way of raising children.
In short, each grandparent is unique and irreplaceable. Parents should strive to share time with these very important people.
